To all the Father’s out there on Fathers Day

I wasn’t sure if I was going to write a post to Dads today.  I wrote one on Mother’s Day for my mom, but my dad wasn’t really around much when I was growing up.

I was actually lucky that my dad wasn’t around.  He had some big issues and for a while there it skewed my own relationships and ability to feel safe in a relationship.

It wasn’t until I met my husband and saw the great capacity he has to love that I realized just what a real dad is.  I had never met a man that loves his sons in the way he does and for that I will be eternally grateful.  He changed my life when I met him and showed me a whole new way of being in this world.

Of course, I did a lot of my own internal healing before I was even able to meet him.  Prior to me doing my work with and for myself, I never would have been in the state of vibration to allow such a great guy into my heart space.  That is for another post though.

For all the Dad’s out there that are no longer married and try really hard to connect with your kids, thank you.  For all the women out there that try really hard to encourage this, thank you.

I have many dad friends that totally adore their children.  I have many clients that adore their children.  For some, it is easy to have a relationship with their kids.  For others they have to fight tooth and nail just to be able to see them.

I have many clients that use their children as weapons against their ex spouse.  Please don’t do this.  Your kids hear what you say to your friends on the phone or in the backyard even if you don’t say it right to their face.  If you have issues, please work on yourself, don’t let your own issues taint the vision children have of their dad.

I acknowledge that there are men out there that have gotten involved in drugs, or are partiers or simply ditch their kids for other reasons.  I can tell you from the hundreds of readings I have done (and dads I have talked to either living or passed over), they don’t ever do this from a place of feeling good about themselves.  They do not leave because they don’t care about their kids, they leave because they truly believe their kids are better off without them.

Its also important to remember that when a relationship breaks down, it is generally not the kids that dad is leaving.  Just because dad has left the home, the city or the province, does not mean that he has abandoned his kids.  He has not abandoned his kids unless you haven’t heard from him in years.

I won’t say much more on the subject, but I wanted to point out that fathers need to have their voices heard too, and there are way too many loving men out there that are getting the run around when they try and connect with their children.

I just wanted to acknowledge them and send them some love on this Father’s Day if they are not able to see their kids.