How I Beat My Depression

Disclaimer:   I’m not a doctor.  I will not tell you that anti-depressants don’t work.

I am NOT a medical doctor and I am NOT telling you that you should stop listening to your doctor. I am NOT telling you to go off medication, if you are on it. I am NOT telling you that you are to blame for any illness you have.

The entirety of this post is to tell you what I have learned and what I have done to feel better. We are all on individual journeys, and what is right for me might not be right for you.

 

Okay, now that that is out of the way, here is the post:

How I Cured Myself of Ongoing Depression

When I write this this blog, it is always with the intention of helping you to live your best life. To overcome difficulties, to truly manifest the life that you desire.

I am here to help people. I know this.  It has been my calling since I was a child.  Even when I was very young, I can remember wanting to help people feel better.  I remember feeling that I had things to share that could help.

I have always had a strong connection with Source. I have always been able to feel the energy around me.  I didn’t always know what it meant.  I just knew I could feel it when someone was upset, or if they weren’t speaking their truth (still can).

I always knew that my energy was creating. ALWAYS.  Even if I did not have the words to explain it properly, it was an inner knowingness that I still cannot fully explain to this day.

Even though I have known this my whole life, I have still had challenges. I have still been sucked into negative vortexes and stayed there for much too long.  There have been times where I went for months or years ‘forgetting’ my connection to Source.  I have been in bad relationships.  I have lived with alcoholics, drug addicts, and abusers (I didn’t realize at the time that I couldn’t help everyone).  I have struggled financially.  I have suffered depression.  I have been single and wanted a relationship.  I have had health issues that seemed to hang on forever.  The list goes on, but I think you get the point.  I am sharing this with you to let you know that as much as I share inspiring things, I have been where you have been.  I am NOT there now, and I have not been there, except for very brief moments, for a very long time.  My life is good now, and I CREATED IT THAT WAY.  I share this because I KNOW, without a doubt that whatever you are going through, you DO have the power to change it.  YOU CAN CREATE DIFFERENT THINGS FOR YOURSELF.

Your Thoughts Create Your Reality

I’ve probably said that 100 times throughout these writings over the years. I know a lot of you get this intellectually, but you still can’t quite get over the hump of making it work for you.  You do your affirmations, you try and think positive, you have vision boards, or meditations you do, but you still can’t seem to get past whatever it is.

I want to tell you a bit about my personal challenge with depression and perhaps how I beat it will help you with whatever challenge you may be going through right now.

We all have moments where we don’t feel our best. Some of us have moments when we are downright depressed ~ feel like crying, sleeping, killing ourselves, wondering what the point of life is etc.  Thinking and wondering if this is all there is to our life.  Feeling like we have wasted our precious time not doing what we came here to do.  Feeling helpless to change our circumstances.  I have been there in the past.  I used to go there a few times a year (ask my husband, he used to worry about me).  I NEVER go there anymore.  I can’t even find that feeling anymore.  Ever.

I won’t lie to you. There are times when I do feel a little ‘sad for no reason’.  Or ‘depressed’ if you will.  I no longer use the word ‘depressed’ though, because to me that word has a much more permanent feeling vibration to it.

In the past when I felt this way, I would talk to myself much differently than I do now.

In the past if I found myself feeling sad, or depressed, I would say things like:

Why am I feeling this way?

What is wrong with me?

Am I even living the life I’m supposed to be living. Shouldn’t it be easier if I am on the right path?

It’s not logical I feel this way, my life is good.

Why am I so sad?

Why am I so depressed?

Why does my life suck?

Why won’t so and so, do such and such.  I don’t like this situation, but I can’t change it, because they are acting a certain way (or doing a certain thing, or ????)  Their actions are screwing up aspects of my life.  If only they would change, I would be able to do something differently.

Why don’t I have the energy to get off my ass and do something? I know if I went for a walk I would feel better, but I can’t even find the energy to get dressed.

Why did I waste all those years?

Why am I wasting this day? Being all sad.  Its beautiful outside, I have a great family, why am I so stuck.

Why, why, why?

I think you get the picture.

Many people will tell you that depression is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain.  It’s not.  It starts with your thinking, gets followed up by your energy, gets exacerbated by the circumstances that appear in your life (because of your thinking), and then your brain starts to change.  It gets a new ‘set point’.  It’s like “what came first the chicken or the egg”.

What came first the thoughts, the depression or the changes in the brain chemistry?

First off. I NEVER ask “Why” anymore.  It is what it is.  When I used to ask myself why, I would come up with a million reasons why I could be depressed.  Guess what that got me?  More reasons to be depressed.  Even things that were not originally on my radar came up.  Things that were out of my control came up (a lot).  Other people and their issues came up.

 

These Are Real World “Tips” of What I Do

Questions I ask myself when that feeling of depression comes over me now:

• I am an empath, and I truly do feel the energy of others and take on their crap ~ unknowingly sometimes. So the first question I ask is “Is this mine?”  For me personally, and probably for you too if you are reading this, that is the FIRST question you should ask yourself.
  
  
• Is there something that I have control over that I can change? (often the answer to this is no, because we cannot change other people or things).
  
  
• Am I tired? or  Am I hungry?
  It amazes me how we have ‘trained’ ourselves out of listening to our most basic needs. We ‘hold it’ when we need to go to the bathroom, we don’t nap when we are tired, we don’t eat when we are hungry.  This is something that I have been personally working on for a while now.  Listening to what my PHYSICAL BODY NEEDS.  I BET that those of you who feel depression, could answer “Yes” to one of these two questions AT LEAST 50% of the time.
  
  
• Am I trying to be something I’m not?
  Much of our depression comes from trying to conform to what other people’s expectations are of us. We are an artist trying to be a bookkeeper; or a healer trying to elicit change by working in a government office; or an executive trying to be a full time mommy;  or a science geek trying to serve fries with a smile.  Or a happy person that feels guilty that they ‘have it so good’ (yes, this is a ‘thing’).  Or a stay at home wife that feels the need to be ‘perfect’, and always be keeping the house clean, to make her husband happy ~ after all he’s working and she’s not (I threw this in there because this particular issue COMES UP A LOT with my clients).   Anyway, ask yourself. “Am I trying to fit my round peg into a square hole?”I must tell you, that there is nothing wrong with working a job (bookkeeper, serving fries etc.), to support yourself. It is whether you are focusing on using the job to get what you want (rent/food money/savings/debt paid off/a great vacation); or whether you are focused on being stuck in the job forever.  When you use the job to get ahead you are empowered.  When you think you are stuck doing what you do not like forever you are disempowered.
  
  
• Another thing I do VERY differently when these down moods hit me, is I say, “This will pass, it always does”.  (as opposed to having a laser focus on the fact I feel like crap, and trying to figure out why).
  
  
• Often I will take a nap and listen to an audio. I choose the audio based on what seems to be specifically ‘bothering’ me in that moment. I have linked to many of my favorites over the years on this blog ~ Meditation Posts.
  
  
• I will read an inspiring book.

   

• I will go for a walk (sometimes you really gotta push yourself for this one).
  
  
• I will go out and sit in the grass, or hug one of the big trees out in my yard (easier than going out in public).
• I remind myself that this just happens sometimes, it’ll go away (if, I let it).

   

• Instead of asking “why” questions in my head, which creates a snowball of negative energy, I sit and write lists of things I am grateful for.

The only time my depression HAS EVER lasted more than a morning, (or maybe a day), is when I thought about how depressed I was or asked myself the “why” questions I have listed above.

For me personally, the best thing I do for myself when I feel like this, is that when nothing seems to be working to pull me out of it, I go to sleep for a time (10 minutes to 3 hours). Nothing will screw up your head, thoughts and energy more than fatigue.  (Think of cranky babies that have no coping skills because they ‘missed their nap’.  Just because you are ‘older’ doesn’t mean you aren’t human with human needs).

I gotta tell you, I almost didn’t write this post. I didn’t want to get into ‘blaming’ you for your depression.  And I am NOT blaming you for your depression. Depression is a REAL thing, and it does change who we are, our brain chemistry, and how we show up in the world.  The ENTIRE reason for this post is that I myself suffered from depression and I came out of it … ON PURPOSE.

I am hoping that these things will work for you. I understand if they don’t (they won’t always work for everyone, we are all so unique).  I am not here to judge anyone.  I just wanted to share what worked for me, hoping and praying that it will work for you.  If just ONE person, the hours it took me to write it will be well worth it.

 

Always with Love,

Tamara

 

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Disclaimer:  

I’m not a doctor.  I will not tell you that anti-depressants don’t work.

I am NOT a medical doctor and I am NOT telling you that you should stop listening to your doctor. I am NOT telling you to go off medication, if you are on it. I am NOT telling you that you are to blame for any illness you have.

The entirety of this post is to tell you what I have learned and what I have done to feel better. We are all on individual journeys, and what is right for me might not be right for you.

 

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