5 ways to figure out what your true Beliefs and Expectations are and to change them if you need to:

I wrote a blog post yesterday called “What do you Really Expect“.  I got a good question in the comments, so I am taking the opportunity to answer that question in another blog post.

This was the comment/question:

“The tricky part is to know what your sub-conscious is expecting. So, how do you know?
Because sometimes I have expectations and beliefs about certain things, and what comes into my experience is almost the opposite… Even though I felt pretty certain what my deep- down beliefs and expectations were.”

This is my answer:

1.  You can try a muscle testing modality such as Psych K.
2.  You need to become very aware of your thoughts and feelings.  In the restaurant example in my last post, if you have a bad experience, you need to be aware of what you thought when it happened.
Was your thought “Bad service again!  What the hell, I expected it to be good, I thought I was over this creating bad BS”.  Right there, with that thought, where did your focus go?  Certainly not to a place that supports your energetic expectation it would be good.
What if you were to say “Oh, everything always works out for me, my server must be having a bad day, think I’ll smile at them, appreciate them and send them some nice energy”.
Right there you are NOT even thinking about whether you are creating good feeling or bad feeing things, you are just appreciating someone/something.
3.  If it involves someone else, disconnect your energy from them.  You can send them that loving energy without getting angry psychic ties in there.  Put yourself in their shoes.  It is their bad day, don’t make it yours.
4.  Realize that maybe it’s not always about you.  Yes, you had the bad experience to shine a light on something for you.  We are constantly creating things.  But what you do with it (the information/feedback from an experience), is what will help to form your beliefs.
5.  Maybe, just maybe, you are in the space you are in so that you can send love to a situation.  Put yourself in the shoes of the other person, if you do this, you will be able to soften any resistance.  Maybe your beliefs ARE what you think they are (positive), and they are so positive you have the ability to change someone’s day (or life), just by staying positive in a seemingly negative situation.

I find that you can change your energy just by thinking and feeling differently in any given situation.  A personal example from my own life is traffic.  I used to love driving.  Then for some reason I started to get more impatient with other drivers.  I would comment in my head about their driving skills or lack thereof, or I would get angry that someone was tail gaiting or on their phone and not paying attention to the road (and almost hitting me).  I knew how the energy worked, but I kept doing it.  Which of course helped to grow my belief that other drivers were nuts, driving was NOT fun, and was downright dangerous.
Then I got sick and tired of not wanting to drive.  I used to love driving, I found myself avoiding driving.  So I decided to challenge my Belief (that I created), that everyone drove like a freaking maniac and was trying to kill me.
Every time I got in my car, I did a small meditation, focusing on a violet flame and surrounding my car in a big bubble.  I would go out, and if I did happen to see something, I would just say to myself, “maybe they have a medical emergency and are rushing to the hospital”.  Or if someone was on the phone, I would think “maybe they have a young child that really needed to hear their voice right that second”.  I made up all kinds of excuses to be more patient with people.  And I sent them love energy.
And guess what?  I RARELY ever have experiences in my car that are stressful.  I can be on a crowded highway and look in my rearview mirror and there will be no traffic for miles.

This worked for me because I had a belief that it would work.  It worked because EVERYTHING IS ENERGY.  The minute I took my focus and energy off of ‘taking my life in my hands every time I get in a car’, it stopped being an issue.  If I see a crazy driver now I don’t think “What the hell, I thought I was over this”.  I think, oh, “Things always work out for me, so there’s a reason that person cut me off and is now in front of me.  I don’t know why, but it’s all okay”.  This kind of energy/statement is one that completely diffuses the energy.  It’s like a little blip on a radar screen that disappears.
Try it.  You can change your beliefs.  But you need to do it by replacing negative with positive.  And you need to BE AWARE, and you need to CONSTANTLY and CONSISTENTLY PRACTICE.